Introduction. How to know that you exist. How to awake as a gigantic insect. How to fire the neurons in your head. How to be free. How to outwit Aristotle. How to know what knowledge is. How to stop worrying about the evil genius. How to be a ghost in the machine. How not to have feelings or beliefs. How to tell the future. How to be a philosophical scientist. How to turn noise into meaning. How to know what we are talking about. How to live on slippery slopes. How to judge whom to save. How not to eat people. How not to be harmed by your death. How to be God. How to sympathize with the devil. How to be a monkey endlessly typing. How to be seduced by logic. How to be an object of desire. How not to be nasty, brutish and short. How to tolerate the intolerable. How not to be a three-legged frog. How not to be squeezed by time. How to outdo artificial intelligence. How to deceive yourself. How to love what does not exist. How not to be left looking after the clothes. How to hear the Sirens' song in safety. How to think like a bat. How to see beauty. How to know when to stop. How to bring meaning to life. Glossary. Index.