Gemma Hartley wrote an article in Harper's Bazaar in September 2017 called 'Women Aren't Nags - We're Just Fed Up', which instantly went viral.
The piece, and this book, are about 'emotional labour', i.e. the unpaid, often unnoticed effort and work that goes into keeping everyone around you comfortable and happy.
The Problem That Had No Name tackles the big issues surrounding emotional labour: the historical underpinnings and roots in feminism, the benefits and burdens of this kind of effort, and the specific contexts where emotional labour plays a major but undervalued role, including relationships, work, sex, parenting, politics and self-care.
'This book opened my eyes to why, for so long (too long) women have carried the mental load. It's full of advice for women and men on overcoming the relentless arguments and looking at the bigger picture.' Clemmie Hooper, AKA Mother of Daughters
Gemma Hartley is a mother and journalist on a mission: to throw fresh light on the hidden burden of 'emotional labour' (washing, wiping, worrying, soothing, shopping, preparing, planning, cooking, caring), and find out why it is that the bulk of these thankless, hugely time-consuming and frustrating jobs fall to women.
Her article: 'Women Aren't Nags; We're Just Fed Up,' was shared by millions of readers, giving voice to a huge number of women whose frustration and anger is mixed with incredulity. Is this really where we're at 50 years post-feminism? Gemma's quest to get to the bottom of the problem and find out how to solve it will take you deep into your own subconscious bias, and sees her challenging the foundations of her own marriage to try to forge a better, more balanced way to live.
Fed Up puts forward a thought-provoking, honest and impassioned case that any woman in a relationship should take an unflinching look at her own home life and ask: "How could we do this better?" The answer might just save your sanity, and your relationships.
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Gemma Hartley is a freelance journalist who received her BA in English Writing from the University of Nevada, Reno.
Her work has been published in Glamour, The Washington Post, Harper's Bazaar, Women's Health, and The Huffington Post amongmany others. She lives in Reno, Nevada with her husband and three children.